Corruption

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Loss

I lost myself
to madness
Everything was questioned
the moment
every feeling
became tainted with my corruption

Like a deafening roar it consumed the silence in my head
My soul was torn asunder
I begged for mercy
and I fell to my knees as I cried so desperately
so deeply, until my eyes simply asked why

This was not who I was
I screamed at a world deaf to this anguish
It could not hear nor touch my grief
Like razors the view of the world cut who I was
Yet I could do nothing but wish
to be whole,
to be free

Each stranger calmly walked by
Not losing even a single stride
Only casually glancing down as they could not care
I asked for help
I pleaded for them to take my hand

Eventually one soul
This courageous and brilliant person
Stopped by my side
Watching me ever so closely as I bled from my heart

And they reached out
A perfect white hand
Open
Caring
Offering to pull me from the darkness

I grasped it
My hand held onto it as if I had never held anything before
For a moment I was saved
Someone had lent me strength

Yet then I realized
My hands were covered red
The soul I had within me was too used
It had been begging too long
My fists were battered and bleeding from trying too long

And I let go
Having seen my life ruin such a perfect white hand
Someone trying to help me
A caring saint who only offered me comfort

and I repaid that charity
by tainting them as well

A walk in the park

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Daily thoughts, Inquisitive

Bright sun
Warm breeze
echoes of geese on the water

Green grass
Brisk aroma
Details left so small within my mind

Simple thoughts
Magical dreams
The things that fuel my breath

Laughing casually
Aimless wandering
Defining everything of who I am

Subtle love
Living intoxication
This life I call my own

Completely freeing
Delightfully inspiring
Just a simple walk in the park

I ask you once heart, let me love myself

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Friendship, Love

If I tried
One last time
To care
If I cried
Over losing
a heart thats mine
If I died
Peacefully falling to a slumber
I cannot define

Would I remember
That you were one of a kind
Something I can only hope to find
If I survive
Holding onto a dream
Lost in a thought I cannot recall
Would I know why

Dear heart
Can I not see you leave me behind
As I succumb to memories of lost recall
Can my soul bare to lose a part
Can I believe that my hope will yet define
Something so small that may help to remind

Please give me mercy
Let me hear the voice lost in time
Bring forth your vision and let me see
Let me live my life
Simple and free
Let me remember
Give me a moment
Let my love be the bond that tethers
To make whole these fragments
A chance to find my past
So it can lead me to from the dark

All I need
Is one spark
Give me a chance
Help me break my fear
Set my soul ablaze
A moment of light
To save me from this maze

I ask you once heart,
let me love myself
as I dare to believe
one last time
to care
I will cry
over losing you
and if I die
I will not forget
not even in peaceful slumber
that you are my dream
and that I
am nothing
but the man who cared
enough to love

The Smile

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Dedicated Poems, Romantic

That moment I met you
It was remarkable
~Wait
No it wasn’t

You were remarkable
The second I glimpsed you
just standing there
dancing without moving

I swear you touched me
from across the room
your fingers brushing my neck
throwing my thoughts to chaos

Yet you didn’t move
anything but your lips
my god, do you realize
how you touched me

Intoxication

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Loss

You know I dream
of things

Beautiful
cold
passionate

I touch
my lips pressed against you
as if you beg me to be consumed

Yet I lose everything
My hand fumbles
a second becomes eternity
bright light
loud sound

Chaos
Simple and without purpose
My heart races
it rages
the sound becomes intense
then silent

My thoughts become clear
as if crystal
defined in a vision without reason
and my world begins to change

Yet I find no point
no anchor to hold myself to
The world spins
My grasp on reality fading away

One moment
My soul is awake
Alive and vibrant
the next
my eyes close
and never open

My slumber assured
the world defiantly moving
and I rest
quietly
waiting for my spirit to purge itself
to take a slow steady breath
and awaken
to lose myself to reality
as I reach for something
to drown out the world I left behind

Was that a kiss?

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume One, Love, Romantic

This one was written because I got caught writing about romance in the Sunset last night and I thought there was something worth writing about. It started out as a section of the above poem, but then became something itself – more aligned to the idea of what a real kiss embodies.

Was that a kiss?

What passion can be felt in brushing your cheek

Dreams are not gone when my eyes are closed

What thoughts I remember as I feel the pause in your breathing

Dreams are so real when I know you are there

What emotion can be created by a simple fragrance

Dreams are vivid when I feel you so close

What fire can be given to a thought so small

Dreams are beyond description when our lips touch

What can I tell you of that day we said hello

Dreams are not forgotten when we said good-bye

Soul fire

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume One, Loss, Love, Lust, Romantic

This burning feeling

A hatred searing my skin

It burns me

I burn myself

Can I not be happy within

Is this damnation I give

Or is this feeling I cannot live

I lust for the calming

I want nothing more than my peace

Can I never hear my thoughts

My mind so rash I scream within

Please let these thoughts relent

I cannot give myself this calm

For I have never forgiven this doubt

I am not to blame yet I hate this game

When will I forgive myself

Forgotten

Posted by Barry Hurd in Author's Favorites, Coffee - Volume One, Creative Writing, Daily thoughts

I never thought this blood would come off. I tried but failed. I saw your face so motionless that it crept into my soul. You were so young. So pretty. You looked like you should be laughing with friends or running like the wind. Why did you do it? Why? Couldn’t you keep it together just one more day? Someone would have cared. Someone. Anyone. I cared. You didn’t even know me. I cared so much that I begged you to come back. I didn’t even know your name. Why did you let go? I’m sorry this world blinded you. I’m sorry this world was blinded by you. You deserved to be seen. Everyone does. You deserve so much more than to lay here by yourself cold and alone. You were never alone. You were never alone. 

Surviving

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume One, Creative Writing, Spiritual

On my knees? That’s where you think I deserve to be? You’ve got a lot of nerve for someone who took so much from me. You can take my family and you can destroy my life, but I’ll never believe that you are anything good. I’ll grind my teeth, push myself till my bones break, and fight until my blood stains the grass red. I won’t quit. Never. I won’t quit because you can’t make me. This fight is something you can’t win. You’ll have to kill me to make me quit. You can make every second of every minute filled with pain, but it’s not going to break me. It’s going to push me to succeed. I’m going to ride the fury you gave me until I see eye to eye with you and then I’m going to show you that no one is god. You have to beat me into the ground until I’m gone forever because every time I get up the only words escaping my lips will be “I survived”.

Castaway

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Loss, Spiritual

I awoke
In a dream
a place so beautiful
with blue ocean and crimson sky

Everything was perfect
white clouds
brilliant sun
but I was lost

My life was good
but alone
The act of breathing
reminded me I was adrift

My voice could scream
So loudly, so clear
That I dared myself to sing
A sonet carried away by a southern breeze

Simple words
Lacking inspiration
void of anythign but feeling
‘No Hope’

I wouldn’t survive
not for lack of trying
Yet I would perhaps still defy
one last reason to die

My savoire
Oh yes, the valiant spirit who saved my soul
had hope castaway by another
bottled for an eternity as if floating in the sea

Deep water
Blue ocean, tidal passion so unforgiving
I tie myself to a heart still floating
My only hope to save one breath, one last moment of dream

To scream, no sing
To declare that I can yet believe
That vision clouded by morning fog
Could breathe resurrection into my words

Yet I watch, as the sun falls beneath my love
As I hold onto the sunset’s vision settling under the horizon
I simply grow cold, as I gaze east calmly waiting
Wondering if my faith will keep me above the darkness below

This voyage, this fate
a maiden’s life lost with me
Signaled the north tide abruptly changing west
as my heart settled at the bottom to rest

May I yet ponder, my cruel fate may not be unjust
As my eyes see the brilliant grace of night
and I fall unwanted into my sleep, hoping, wanting, needing…
to simply see the wonderous sun and morning glory so bright