I remember the day very clearly, there was a fine mist in the air and the morning dew formed droplets of water on the brim of my hat as I bowed my head. I was doing everything I could to remember a better place, trying to forget the memories that caused the tears on my face to fall into the puddle of rainwater at my feet.
I thought to myself as I asked so many questions, trying to comprehend the way the way everything except me seemed so vibrant. Even the grass seemed so beautiful and green, so lavish in texture that the voice in my head wanted to talk about anything but what I felt inside. I heard voices in the background, the soft tone of an older man trying to comfort the people around me.
I heard so many words that were simply absorbed by the grief my heart felt. The words “I’m so sorry” must have been uttered so many times that I questioned if the truth I was holding onto inside my chest was simply insanity.
I would ask myself, could love prevail? Standing amongst a crowd of compassionate strangers reminded me that I was now alone more than ever. I was the lost love, the sweet soul who gambled his heart away on trying to adore a child that would never breathe again.
My words at the time made little coherent sense. I tried to convey the way a man should care for his life, his family. Yet I cried. The fateful act of death had taught me a lesson that I never cared to learn-
That one should love, not for the expectation of love, but to feel something that can only be experienced alone as you accept how much it truly meant to you.
Last 5 posts in Love
- The Valentine Heart - February 7th, 2008
- The Truth of Love - January 27th, 2008
- Tessa's Memory - November 26th, 2007
- The wind, my subtle care no more - June 25th, 2007
- One moment, with purpose. - June 18th, 2007
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