True Love of Coffee

The Death of a Lover

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Loss, Love

I tried, with every ounce of who I was I held on
Her hand was warm, her eyes piercing
I can be honest,
I was desperate
Her lips though, were so cold
I feverishly held her against me for a moment
As she didn’t speak, telling me she had to go
I could feel what she meant
But I was ashamed
I simply wasn’t good enough
I couldn’t change her mind
My faith, my belief, my love
wasn’t enough
I tried,
I begged her to stay,
as the fire in her eyes turned gray
I lost myself in my screaming
as I held her closer than I ever had
and as the rain came down,
Part of me became so sad
as my life changed  against my futile resistance
I said good-bye
to everything
I gave my heart to you
to all I knew
and I cried
that day you died

Losing Definition

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Dreams, Spiritual

I lost myself, not entirely
But as if I was without function
My life resembling a locked doorway
or perhaps a key
But never both, simple one or the other

I was always so
Some viewers failed to realize I was a puzzle
That my edges fit into another
Because they had never seen my partner
nor even knew someone else could match me so well

I was the cup
Designed to hold something
So securely
Yet never finding enough to fill me
I was simply cracked and the essence left me too quickly

I was a lit candle
So futile in nature
As I sat afloat in a sea of despair
That gave me so many reflections to ponder upon
Yet no one would see the direction I was moving

I could be complete, yes with hope
Perhaps someone could fix me,
To give me enough love that I could function as intended
They could hold me, broken and unloved
and make me feel as if I had a purpose

If one soul could reach me, touch my broken soul
I would be amazing
My light would inspire
Allow them to see something worth loving
because without them, I will never function

The Climb

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Daily thoughts, Defiant, Spiritual

I went to the end of the world
Wondering if the precipice I stood upon
Could hold the weight of my life
I fathomed that others had been here before
That I was not the one who defined this point
Yet it was a sanctuary of civil defiance
That we had all climbed upon

The world was so small
No longer could one define themselves as traveler
From here we may all be seen as avatars
Icons of determination looking at ourselves
The color of the city bleaching our thoughts
Perhaps the only thing we can see clearly
Are the very clouds we all stand upon

I was not the first here
With all due respect I was not that original
Nor was I competitive enough to fight for the title
Merely a person with thoughts of being inquisitive
Needing to see this realm from a point so heavenly
Reaching out at the untouchable world and screaming
As my soul found itself flying

Defeating Death

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Loss, Love

Oh dear lady death,
With hands so cold
So chilling
Does anyone welcome the embrace

You are immortal
A soul forever roaming in search of
The glory of life fading to nature’s whim
Yet you seek to find sustenance

Does it come to you
As you stare into the eyes of tomorrow
Trying to drain our lives with your mission
To be alone, wandering with no other

The robes you wear
Torn and sad, unlike a peasant from street
You hide your gaze under the darkness of your heart
As you spitefully tear away our hope of living

The scythe you hold
Is your only possession
Made of steel so cold
That only a heart such as yours can wield it

Dear lady death,
I am here before you
To speak these words
With my last breath

To instill my faith
as I gaze into your eyes
and without question
Take your hand

You are not alone
The value of our lives
Will never balance your regret
Of hating the man you once loved

No, our lives will torment you
Fill your mind with waking despair
Test the insanity you have kept for millennia
As we dare to love without fear

I will look into your heart
And as my breath escapes my lips
One last time
I will whisper, I love you

The Knight’s Letter

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Honor

As a sign of my faith
My lord, I send this letter to you
For me my liege there is no resurrection
There is only my word, to share this view
Of a battlefield that defines my devotion

This was the story of one life, my own
A savior, a warrior sworn to your crown
To uphold a code of chivalry and so much more
Yet I must confess lord, tomorrow I will die
My spirit, my body, and my life will have been yours

My word will be beset with great challenge
Yet I have given it freely to you so many years ago
I will not fail to give my people hope
And in death I will stand behind your crown for all eternity
I will become the hero you asked me to be

In my breathing
There will be desperation
As my hand falls to the ground
Trying to lift my body
Pushing against blood soaked soil

My will may come to breaking
Following the footsteps of my body
It will fail to keep me in motion
Feverishly trying to maintain my life
And losing a war that was already over

I will fight against all those who oppose you
Our soldier’s bravery will hold you’re banner high
The last words we scream will instill awe in our family
My final breath of air will be in defiance to your enemy
And my body will come to rest under your flag

My lord, I beg of you to take my life and remember it
To raise a cup of your finest ale and salute my sacrifice
I will be long gone by the time you read this
Yet my kin, my blood, will have found safety in our homeland
My liege, it was an honor to be your knight

I tried once…

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant

I tried once
To become something
Special
To push myself
Farther and harder
Than was possible

I tried once
To become someone
Unique
To evolve
Beyond
The here and now

I tried once
To become more
Than I was
To believe in things
That I couldn�t see
Anywhere

I tried once
To become anything
That someone wanted
To hold to myself
Because no one else would
Care

I tried once
Yes, I tried
Again and again
To look upon life
So beautiful
That I cried

I tried once
To see the world
Through eyes
That could not deny
How amazing
My life was

The River and the Rock

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Daily thoughts, Defiant

A beautiful sun
With light glistening off the water
as the tide beat against the shore
Of a place I called home

It was here I defined my destiny
A place I had found life
During a thousands moments only I pondered
On a chance thought that gave me strength

I wondered
Was love worth the life I had
Did the hope I poured into my action
Create a reason to be someone special

Or was I merely unique
Enough to be alone as I glance across a river
Realizing that it moves so quickly I cannot dare enter
Trying so hard to witness desire floating by

My heart beat within my chest
I could feel the surge of hope rampage through my body
Trying to feel its way through me
Like a lost soul being drawn under by powerful current

I could feel loss from being adrift
Yet I felt my feet securely holding my stance
I knew that I had cast aside part of who I was
and it was sacred to who I needed to be

I do not know if I called out from the shore
or whether I was drowning beneath the tide
as my lungs tried gasping for air
from being so alone as I pass downstream

My life had become two parts
One safe in knowing, one lost in seeking
A fork dividing my soul into trying to save myself
and feigning the difference of knowing who I was

One poignant watcher believing it was strong
Standing upon earth so secure it would never falter
But being scared of losing itself to the motion it could not control
Forever being terrified that it had only one vantage to gaze from

The other adventurer risking itself by defiantly braving unknown danger
And every person it loved seeing freedom and recklessness
In a spirit so artistic you could see life in trying to survive
Yet hopelessly lost to a force it did not control

Yet I found myself as my feet slipped and I fell into the river
And as the river threw me onto the rocks of undiscovered hope
The strongest part of me accidentally becoming fluid once again
While the adventurer stopped and rescued it’s own soul

Partner in Life

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant

The most beautiful lady
is not one who adorns herself
She is the one who abandons society
and holds herself tight against me

She is a fire
not limited to the things she burns
She loves me for who I am
and yet she consumes me so passionately

She can deny me
and often struggles to be who she needs
Yet her spirit is defiant
and holds itself to a dream she can breathe

Others may confuse her as being frail
yet I know better
As she fights me to the ground
and forces me to plead for my soul

I do not give up
nor do I let her win
I simply surrender
because her spirit is more than I can defy

I do not allow myself to go easily
breathing so hard I cannot think clearly
I struggle and yet she holds me
barely leaving me a moment to break free

Yet I do not take it
for her faith is what burns me
I fight until I can dare to no longer
and I pray she gives me mercy

I break upon her heart
and I succumb to her strength
I fall beneath her passion
she wins against all my effort to prevail

Yet she saves me
as I breathe the last moment of my life
I fall deeply into darkness
and her lips touch my body gently

I am the fallen
yet I am saved by someone who is my better
She is my partner
The women who dares to love me

She is the one who wins this fight
as her heart burns so very bright
This woman who dares to love me
is simply the only one who I can see

Corruption

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Loss

I lost myself
to madness
Everything was questioned
the moment
every feeling
became tainted with my corruption

Like a deafening roar it consumed the silence in my head
My soul was torn asunder
I begged for mercy
and I fell to my knees as I cried so desperately
so deeply, until my eyes simply asked why

This was not who I was
I screamed at a world deaf to this anguish
It could not hear nor touch my grief
Like razors the view of the world cut who I was
Yet I could do nothing but wish
to be whole,
to be free

Each stranger calmly walked by
Not losing even a single stride
Only casually glancing down as they could not care
I asked for help
I pleaded for them to take my hand

Eventually one soul
This courageous and brilliant person
Stopped by my side
Watching me ever so closely as I bled from my heart

And they reached out
A perfect white hand
Open
Caring
Offering to pull me from the darkness

I grasped it
My hand held onto it as if I had never held anything before
For a moment I was saved
Someone had lent me strength

Yet then I realized
My hands were covered red
The soul I had within me was too used
It had been begging too long
My fists were battered and bleeding from trying too long

And I let go
Having seen my life ruin such a perfect white hand
Someone trying to help me
A caring saint who only offered me comfort

and I repaid that charity
by tainting them as well

I ask you once heart, let me love myself

Posted by Barry Hurd in Coffee - Volume Two, Defiant, Friendship, Love

If I tried
One last time
To care
If I cried
Over losing
a heart thats mine
If I died
Peacefully falling to a slumber
I cannot define

I ask you once heart,
let me love myself
as I dare to believe
one last time
to care
I will cry
over losing you
and if I die
I will not forget
not even in peaceful slumber
that you are my dream
and that I
am nothing
but the man who cared
enough to love